Hi guys...

It has come to a stage that I have no idea who actually visits... Nevertheless, the fact that there are even any that visits trully comfort this heart of mine~

Had been meaning to blog for a few days already, but for some reason, there seems to be nothing much that has changed... My existence is still rather pathetic. Easily forgotten, and only recognised only when it is convenient, well, that's what it feels like to me.

From where I am, it seems to me that I am the auxilliary member in almost every circle that I have been involved in. Someone who the group can do with, or without.

At times, it may seem that one does not care, but no matter how aloof I may be, the realisation still hurts.

One remembers a time when one used to preach that everyone is the main character is their own story... But recently... That ideal has become something very hard for me to believe...

And that's depressing...

You know, there are times when one wonders what is wrong with one. Why is it that one's life is so dreary, such a bore. Why is it that one has always drawn the short stick in the pursuit of love.

Is it because I'm short, fat and incompetent? Or the fact that I am the antonym of popular?

Really, sometimes I don't even understand myself. Why do I feel so empty, so filled with darkness when one has been so blessed? My family, and the very select few I can truly call friends. They are a great blessing to me... Yet...




I used to believe that my story would have been a comedy. One that is full of humour and laughter. A light hearted piece of literature that would describe my life. However, recently the feel is that it would be nothing but a tragedy. Filled with agnst and sorrow. The pursuit of happiness, that never bore fruit. Where all that one dreamt of, would only remain as such. Dreams.


Man this is long... Now, if you are still reading this, I thank you. But I doubt you read through it because you love me.... My moneys on your boredem that motivated you to read such a long rant. Oh well. That's my life... Always never the first choice.

I'd be glad if I was even your second choice.....